Random Friday

• If there were a gallon of ice cream anywhere in the freezer right now, it would only remain so for another forty-seven seconds. And then it might be. completely. empty. I have needed to allow myself a "cheat" meal (or three) per week so as not to completely fall off the wagon. I served cauliflower "rice" last week. We should have just called it what it was- cauliflower mush and not gotten our hopes up. Watermelon with coconut milk is just not cutting it for an indulgence this Friday night. 

• Porkchop had his tubes put in yesterday. He's fine. He was looped from the pain meds they gave him during surgery and was slow to come out of anesthesia. When we asked him what he wanted for breakfast he said what sounded like "beer". I think he was trying to say burger. When we went to get him his burger for lunch he puked all over himself and his carseat. Yeah, he's a lightweight. But it didn't stop him from wanting to change into his swimming suit and go to the park. His greatest annoyance was not remembering that he did indeed have the green popcicle they promised in recovery.

• We made our Summer Fun list. Scrunch was kicked off the planning committee when her first and only contribution was "dye my hair orange." Husband and I made the list ourselves. And they're going to have fun dammit! We might have planned things a little better when highlighted in bold on Porkchop's discharge paperwork, "NO SWIMMING FOR 4 WEEKS." Oops. 

• Cadbury and Gnomeo are bigger than Jango. This makes their interactions quite hilarious. Juju and Jango are about the same size. Juju is NOT impressed that she has been mistaken by Jango several times as a puppy. She doesn't think there's anything hilarious about him except maybe feeding him spoonfuls of beans from the safety of her highchair. * Note to new readers...Cadbury and Gnomeo are the French Angoras. Juju is my almost 16-month old. Jango is the 8 week old Airedale Terrier. Note to old readers...There might be a quiz on this later.

• Because I am without someone to mock my Netflix selections, I am going to be starting 'Heart of Dixie'. The young women at our last knitting class Wednesday night were talking about it. I've looked it up and looks like I can watch it. I don't like creepy, weird, or scary. A B-rated sappy, cheese-fest is what I'm in the mood for.

• Dear Husband, You know those dark chocolate chunks on a stick from Brussels that are for stirring into your hot chocolate that you've been saving for a romantic evening on the back patio with our new solar mood lighting? Well, I just remembered we had them. I hope the Toronto airport sells gourmet chocolate or a suitable replacement. Sorry.

• I started cleaning out the other side of the garage today. That really is a winter activity. Crap it got hot. I might resume come November.

• Is it too late to start cucumbers from seed?

Jango bobango bananafana fo fango meemymomango Ja-ango!

http://instagram.com/p/Z3ncSHoqfc/

If everyone in your neighborhood jumped off a bridge, would you?

Apparently, I would.

The neighbors next door, the neighbors behind us, the ones kitty corner to that...they all have new puppies. But when my Aunt blasted my Instagram feed with Charlie, I was a goner.

Some girls want jewelry. Others fancy cars. I want more more commitment than that. Like another 10-14 years of it. Happy Anniversary, Birthday, Christmas to me!

His name is Jango.

He's an Airedale terrier. He'll look like this when he grows up.

We raised them growing up and they are awesome family dogs. I am smitten with my new baby. At eight weeks old he still smells puppy. It's one of the best smells in the world. He sleeps on my feet and is scoring major points with Mommy. Jedi thinks he's great. The kids think he's great. And clearly my Husband must love me immensely. After ten years I must be rubbing off on him though, because he wants a corn snake for his birthday. I'm not sure I want to move the puppy teething popcicles over in the freezer enough to make room for rats.

30 Before 30 Update

We made it through the BBQ. We had a nice visit with the in-laws. And I caved to severe peer pressures and brought home a puppy. But more on that later. None of these three things were on my 30 Before 30 list, but they probably should have been.

Make sushi- Back in January we took a class for a date night. It was totally worth it. We even stayed in on Valentine's Day and I went to a cool fish market downtown and made our dinner.

Ice skate in Yosemite- Just before Husband left on his last trip to Israel he flew out of LA so we stopped in Yosemite on our way down to SoCal. I never want to go back to Yosemite in the summer time. In the winter it's so pretty and there's only three other people there. Even though it was gorgeous, I still don't like ice skating. These were taken after I completely froze my tokus off.

Buy something with my initials on it- Mega-clearance from West Elm. It holds my earrings on my nightstand perfectly.

Start violin lessons again- This has been a challenge, but I've committed to practicing an hour a day. My teacher is really nice. She's about my age and we have a lot in common. We can never be BFFs though because she is kicking my trash. She's been playing for over 20 years and played in college on a scholarship. She has a perfectly trained ear and her violin is worth more than I am. She has a system where if you don't practice and pass off your assignment for the week, you get a star. Three stars and she'll drop you as a student. I'm proud to say that I haven't gotten a single star yet. I just chose my repertoire piece to focus on for the next several weeks. Nice, huh?




In June I'm focusing on 30 Days of Yoga, spinning from my bunny, and casting on my Kelmscott sweater.

Friday Random

This is the first time that I've sat down all day that wasn't in my car. I am tired. But so glad that I timed my 'cheat' day with the ward's Young Women Girl's Camp fundraiser dinner! Chips, popusas, tostadas...CARBS!!!

I'm seven days into my detox. No gluten, no grains of any kind actually. No sugar or sweeteners. No processed foods. Two days ago I thought I was starving and was ready to rip someone's head off, but yesterday I felt better. Tomorrow we're hosting a barbecue for Husband's co-workers and their families. It is going to be hard to maintain my resolve, but tri-tip and salsa are allowed so I should be okay. If I cave it's going to be for Texas sheet cake and homemade ice cream. Can you blame me? I mean really.

Porkchop had a pre-op for his surgery next week. He's having new tubes put in. The next day Husband will be back in the Holy Land for a week. I wish I could go, but I just can't figure out how we'd do it. We are planning a little vacation for just the two of us for our 10th anniversary, though. A decade. Weird.

Sarah was the best pink fish ever! For all of three weeks. And then the damn thing jumped out, landed in the sink, and was discovered dead the next morning by an extremely distraught five year old little girl. I am very proud of her though. She took such good care of that little guy and without me even having to ask. We are in a period of mourning and will go buy a new one on Monday.

Even though I'm tired from saying "yes" to too many projects and consistently overbooking us, I still seriously considered talking to husband about a puppy. Our neighbors have a new bulldog puppy and I am puppy hungry.

I started drawing on my eyebrows consistently with Mac's eyebrow pencil. Their makeup is a little spendy, but I think it's worth every penny.

We faxed the paperwork to enroll Scrunch in our local homeschool charter this week. I could write a whole series of posts on our decision and reasons surrounding it, but ultimately I've decided my position is the same as my position on home birth. It is not my job to convert or convince you. And I don't really feel like having the conversation where you use all of my reasons to justify the choices you've made. If you get it, you don't need my reasons. If you're truly curious, you'll ask.

I am super excited about the most recent project in the backyard. We pulled out a section of grass and put in all playground bark. The kids have been playing 'cougars' and 'fishes' non-stop. Don't ask me. I don't understand. They switch from one pretend game to another so fast it's hard to keep up. I did get to be the "working whale" the other day while I was weeding.

My Juju's new trick is to hold your hand and walk everywhere. I think of her as my wittle-baby so it's weird to picture her walking around and playing with the bigger kids. Like it or not, she is.

I've been knitting. Woohoo! And I taught a friend's mutual to knit this week, too. We had fun. I felt so old driving home. I was the knitting-teacher Mom with three kids and a mini van. How did I get here?

I'm trying to think of the most random thing that happened this week as a way to end this Random Friday post but I'm falling asleep and Husband still needs my help wrestling the newly washed slipcovers back on to the couch. Oh, my mom got six new chicks! My name suggestions were Pollo, Loco, Pico, DeGallo, Salsa, and Fresca.

The melting point of a blue Pyrex dish lid is 350 degrees- just in case you were wondering. It only took about three minutes and the awful stench it created for me to realize that I hadn't emptied the oven before turning it on for lunch. Not enough cupboards = storing stuff in the oven. Tell me I'm not the only one.

This was also my melting point. Or at least my brain's. The great mystery of mortality for me is how I can go from being perfectly 'whelmed' to completely and totally overwhelmed in a few minutes. This resulted in my calling in my Husband as a reinforcement and to talk me down. After an afternoon of listing out everything I was doing, should be doing, and everything I wanted to do, the ultimate suggestion was made- that maybe it was time for me to quit my job.

This was so hard, for so many reasons, for me to even consider. But I did. Consider it, I mean.

I prayed and wrestled with the idea continuously for about three days. The answer that I received, while a little frustrating was also incredibly empowering. "It is your choice."

If I want to quit, I can quit. If I want to continue to work, then I should continue to work. But I have the blessing of choice. I choose where I spend my time. Every day when I make my list of what I'm going to do, I choose. I choose which activities I participate in. I choose which activities my family participates in. I even choose what I put in my mouth. (Ahem. *See detox diet*.) This was later confirmed when I had the opportunity the very next day to see a preview of Girl Rising. You should see it. I could write some more (lots more) about it, but for right now its most meaningful message is that I have a choice. That is an incredible blessing, one which I should be more grateful for.

Yesterday and a little bit of today's news.

I almost got out of having to come up with a "pixie-dust for Christmas" solution.

"Mom, I don't need pixie dust if Santa can bring me something much better!"

"What's better than pixie dust?"

"Nothing."

Grrrr-eat.

I love hearing what her pixie dust is going to solve and "magic". When her paints were confiscated due to getting them out (and leaving them out) without asking..."Fine! I'll just magic some with my pixie dust!"

This morning she is going to use her pixie dust on Mommy and Papa when they get old. "I'll magic you young again so you won't die."

She's become fascinated with my putting my make up on. She perches on the counter, a willing assistant-handing me each brush and tube while quizzing me for their uses. Her commentary is as amusing as the pixie dust conversations.

When I brought out the tweezers..."Mom, how did an eye brow hair get all the way over there!?"

Yeah, so I have a couple of uses for the pixie dust. But don't you think I'd have already asked for some if I thought Santa was capable, kid?

In other news, Porkchop has a couple owies from not slowing down. He will allow a Mickey Mouse band-aid on his hand. Only McQueen band-aids on his knees, but REFUSES a band-aid on his nose. "It no owie Mom."

He told us last night he was going to serve a mission if he could take his box of McQueen cars.

Juju doesn't say much at this point. She screeches like a Colobus monkey, which is always a lovely sound for the neighbors to ignore, I'm sure. Oh, she did say thanks after nursing last week which totally weirded me out and I promptly got on the "let's wean this kid" band-wagon. It hasn't worked. Pixie dust or no pixie dust I will wean and potty-train before the summer is through.

The diet is called Whole30. You can Google it, but basically it is a very strict paleo diet. After my monthly migraine left me unable to drive, or see clearly, and then hovering over the porcelain God I was kind of desperate. I was (almost) willing to give up tortillas (for like five hours). I decided it wasn't worth it.

As the long time Mayor and newly appointed Head Zoo Keeper, I worry about what is going into so many other mouths that by golly I'm going to enjoy what is going into mine. I do not eat unhealthily on a regular basis, though I do mention Flaming Hot Cheetos a little often lately. Can't help it. I love them! My new theory is that fear and stress are as carcinogenic and fattening as anything I'd put in my mouth, so for the time being I'll just make sure to move regularly and eat my fruits and vegetables. Maybe I'll cut down on the grapefruit. I really like those, too. I might have had three after dinner tonight, before the Flaming Hot Cheetos. Mercy! Good thing I don't have indigestion.

As for my new position as Head Zoo Keeper?...Like with any entry level job I am hoping there will be opportunities for growth and expansion. I'd like to see a future with two alpacas, a dexter calf, a couple of cashmere goats, some ducks, a sizzle chicken, and probably a Bernese Mountain puppy to help keep an eye on things.

I know some people think pets= more poop. While it's true there's more poop, I think the trade offs are worth it. The conversations that have been sparked with my kids about life and death, the responsibility, chores, learning to care for someone else, empathy, etc...all good stuff. Plus, they are cute. 'Peck' the cockatiel is turning out to have an affinity for my husband, but the bunnies are mine. Even if I let Scrunch name 'Gnomeo' to avoid having to name a future baby brother that. We originally brought home two new bunnies, but one went to live with a friend after hers died unexpectedly and rather tragically. 'Serendipity' was supposed to be for Scrunch and she was more than a little bent out of shape at first. After explaining the situation she was easily bought off with a pink fish named 'Sarah'.

These are newest members of our zoo.

Every night it's, "Please bless Mommy, Papa, Scrunch, Porkchop, Juju, Jedi, Chevy, Cadbury, Gnomeo, Peck, and Sarah." And if Porkchop is saying the prayer he adds, "John's V-truck (for SUV) and the minivan." And I mean every night. And if they forget one, or think they forgot one- they start over. Pretty much everyone gets blessed at least twice. This makes our zoo seem a little crazier than it really is, but what else would you expect from the Crazytown zoo?

No grains.
No dairy.
No sugar of ANY kind.
No carrageenan, MSG, or sulfates.
No legumes.
No alcohol.
No potatoes.

No surprise this little diet lasted all of six hours.

No matter. Today was the worst day on the planet to start a new diet. I'm craving Flaming Hot Cheetos, a bag of licorice nibs, and ice cream-any flavor. Maybe I'll just start cutting out the.......uh.......um......carrageenan? What's carrageenan again?