Never in my life have I been so sick.

I will tell you the same thing I told Holly.

Women talk too much of labor and tout it as "the worst pain". I think they're wrong. A sinus infection can feel like birthing through your brain. But it doesn't end after a few hours, and there's nothing to show for it- unless you have a Neti pot in which case we'll just stop right there. I can hear my mother gagging from 300 miles away. It might not have been so bad had it not followed a week of the flu. But I am getting better.

Like I told Ellie, "I'm upright. So of course I went to Lowe's. Now I regret it. I've never been so sick in all my life. I'm almost sure it was the flu. Or SARS, or huntavirus, but now I never want to get the bird flu- that's for damn sure."

So what does the foggy-brained, sleep-deprived, on-the-mend Mayor do? After Lowe's and going to two different nurseries?

Bring home a cockatiel.

Say, "hello" to 'Peck'.

I lurve him. Even if I do eventually get the bird flu.