Clubbin'

I'm starting a new club and I'll tell you why. I hope you didn't plan on going anywhere for a while, this is going to take a minute to explain. And even once I do, you still might not get it. But crazy speaks to crazy, I've been told.

The mommy club was not for us and so I belonged to the infertile club (IFC). We had what we thought was lots more fun and could not for the life of us figure out how a woman who did not work full time could be so tired at the end of the day. He he. I remember that conversation and have since repented.

Then something happened to the IFC. Through one way or another we became mommies. But I remained uncomfortable with the labor stories and the breastfeeding talk. Thankfully, I had my adoptive mommies club (FSA). Sometimes it's just easier when you don't have to explain what birthmoms are, no one comments on family resemblance, and you can get feedback on openness and appropriate Mother's Day gifts. It was totally normal and expected to hold dual membership in both the IFC and FSA.

But then something else happened and I find myself pregnant. It was in not so many words inferred recently that now I would be in the mommy club. The mama bear within me surged and I took the comment probably a little more personally than it was intended. I have an almost two year old. I've been in the mommy club, thank you very much.

Like a lost Jr. High-er I'm not really sure where I fit in. Am I still infertile? I don't think so. But what if I don't stay pregnant? Will I go back to being infertile or am I still considered part of the IFC until you're in labor? And how about FSA? Is it going to be awkward if I stay pregnant and show up to our playgroups and even a conference? Cuz I'll tell you what...I might have slapped some preggo who plopped herself down next to me and told me "No worries. Everything works out the way it is supposed to." -especially if she used the word preggo.

But I swear I'll lose my mind if I am completely relegated to the full-fledged mommy club. Thankfully I've found myself a couple of mommies who can talk about UFC and painting junk on Craigslist as well as the importance of a daily prune during pregnancy. It's all just too much to think about. I'd be really in for it if I had to worry whether or not Super-Hottie was going to ask me to dance at the next formal.

Rather than don the black eye-liner and Doc Marten boots I am starting a new club. There is only one requirement. It is open to any and all so long as you meet this one requirement. Anyone who is going to go to heaven and ask, WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT!?!?!?! can join. I'm thinking we can wear wristbands with WWTA on them. Oh, and since I made it up, I get to be President.