Play by play

Hi.

We have not been on vacation. We left town. Vacations involve warm beaches, skimpy bathing suits, and sparkly drinks with umbrellas. This little 1700 miles-in-five-days-escapade was not a vacation. But we had fun and Scrunch stayed dry the WHOLE drive. I wore high heels two days in a row, and if there was a record for the amount of family you could visit without having a family reunion, I'd like to receive it. Or get me a sparkly drink with an umbrella.

Brace yourself. You are about to get a play by play of the last five days along with pictures. We're going for a record here. Get yourself a sparkly drink, get comfortable, and have a sit in front of the computer.

Drive to Salt Lake. We did not take pictures. It is a God-forsaken landscape that I'd like to just skip all together. Battle Mountain? Why would anyone battle over that place?

Arrive in Salt Lake and check in to the hotel. Sent husband for a pizza. Sleep on what is obviously not my bed. I have become a bed snob.

Day 1

Visit with my Grammy. Totally confusing to Scrunch because how can we both have a Grammy and they not be the same person? She soon recovered when she realized MY Grammy has "a piece of caaaaandy" throughout her entire house.

McDonald's parking lot to meet the cousins and swap dresses.

Lunch with my Gram (yet another grandma-type person) and Sawyer (a To-to like pooch who thinks he's a person).

Swimming with Grandma Jody and Uncle Tom. It's actually Grandpa Tom, but I laughed so hard when she called him "an Uncle Tom" that trying to break her of the habit now is sort of pointless.

Sleep. Still not my bed, but there weren't any visible bugs so the hotel passed.

Day 2

Wedding and my first day of heels. Grandma and Grandpa Smiff (Smith) came to watch Scrunch. And live up to the expectation of always having a sucker in his pocket.

The whole reason for the trip was to see Husband's sister be married. Yes, they look so young. Yes, she is a few years older than I was when I got married. But I don't remember Husband and I looking so young. Everyone in attendance laughed, some (her dad) cried, and we all felt very, very old.

Luncheon following the wedding. Buffets are brilliant when you've got a bunch of toddlers in tow.

Dinner with the Smiff side of my family. Scrunch keeps a very close eye on this guy. He's on her list of favorites.

Day 3

Breakfast with my Gram and a bunch of folks that carry my maiden name. I'd like to point out that my Gram also has a yellow kitchen and an orange wall.

Drive to St. George in the most horrendous, snow-ridden, driving conditions I've ever been in. Witnessed the ten care pile up that was probably on the news, and thought I was going to give birth on the side of the road. I didn't. And we made it.

Reception. Day two of heels. Don't they look happy (and young)?

Day 4

Breakfast and wearing the kids out at the park. It's gonna be a long drive home. Come hell or high water I will sleep in my bed tonight.

Twelve hour drive home.

I told you to get comfortable.