Monday, March 31, 2008


That's how I felt. I woke up in the middle of the night, not to Little Miss, but to some terribly wrong abdominal cramping. I don't know which is worse, throwing up or just wishing you would so you could get it over with. I don't think it's anything I ate because Husband ate the same thing and he was sleeping soundly. My cooking isn't that bad. I have a feeling (actually I'm pretty sure) it was stress. Not so much stress as more dread.

Tomorrow I go back to work. Only one day a week, but the thought well, obviously makes me sick. Don't worry I'm not dropping her off anywhere. John will work from home once or twice a week and I will go back to being a nurse for eight hours of the day. I have very mixed feelings about the whole plan. I really don't have a lot to complain about. I like my job (most days), they like me, I get to work the days I want, I write my own schedule and I'm only obligated to them one weekend a month. I just wish I could take the Little Miss with me. We'd have lots of fun and my patients would love her! John said absolutely not (plus obviously it's against every OSHA policy ever written), but it was a thought. It wouldn't be so hard if I didn't have to leave her home. It's not like she's alone, she's with her Papa and he dotes on her probably more than I do.

So I guess we will see how long this lasts. I don't have-to have-to go back, but it will make owning property in the great state of CA and our next baby a little easier. Who knows maybe we'll own a house and have a couple of kids before I'm thirty after all. But don't hold your breath, it's going to kill me driving away tomorrow morning. She probably won't notice which will only make me cry harder.


Holly said...

Good luck my friend. I feel for you, that would kill me!!

Mothership said...

I am so sorry I cant even imagine how you are feeling. I already quit my job I get so homesick. Thank you for all the great updates and pics, you have a gorgeous family.

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